Changing my mind
by constipated gold-fish
Summary: A result of Severus trying to protect his memories he gets pulled into them and trapped, he isn't however the only one there. Two young boys meet in these memories and a much needed friendship forms.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Harry wakes up, but he doesn't feel awake, because he doesn't feel pain, this isn't his bed and this isn't his body, it can't be. He opens his eyes, it's not night, but it's not right either. He feels a thick blanket over him and a warmth so comfortable it's like a fantasy. He doesn't want to but he props his body up so he's sitting. The room is wonderful, it has four green walls, one with a window. There's a big brown wardrobe, a little black desk, there a big pile of books. Strangest of all, there's a boy. He's sitting on the wooden floor his legs crossed and his eyes closed.

"Uh-um-m." His voice trembles, he can't fathom words, to unsure of the situation. The boy's eyes fly open, his head snaps towards the intruder in his room.

"Who are you?" Harry noticed how the boy is young too his voice is high but his tone is like an adult. He's calm strange for how he greets an intruder.

"I don't know." And he didn't know, not yet anyway, he was hoping the name his aunt gave him when he started school, wasn't his real one, he wanted a name that was never yelled at him in hatred and disgust.

"Oh... Your not real." The boy turns away and closes his eyes once more, the boy seemed to think this situation was normal and Harry didn't want to waste such a peaceful moment so he decided to lay back down, it didn't matter that it was in such a strange place all that he knew was nothing seemed bad here.

Severus mean while was trying to figure out how to escape his own mind, he had been there a long time and was beginning to forget who he really was, the memory he was caught up in, was just a normal day for the eight year old, in his room, alone and forgotten, how he often spent his days. But then his mind had conjured up a companion, possibly to stop him going insane, he needed something to hold onto before he forgot everything. The boy was laying in his child hood bed. Severus wondered if he knew this boy, he must if he could pull him into his mind, perhaps he had forgotten more already then he had suspected.

The figment of Severus' mind seemed as at ease as he was, this boy was not a bad memories, bad memories sneak up on his and cause his fear and harm, this boy, Severus feels like he has hurt him, the boy had been so nervous in his voice and the way he looked at Severus. He wish he remembered, he couldn't even recall the boys name so neither could the boy. Severus wanted to undo the wrong he felt within him, so he'd talk to the boy. He sat at the end of his bed, they boy was younger then him, shorter and thinner. Where Severus' dark hair was straight the boys was wild, they were both pale.

"Are you awake?" The boy sighs, he opens his eyes to look at Severus, they're green. He rolls over turning away from Severus. "What's wrong?"

"I like your bed, I want to stay here forever." Severus was taken aback, that's not the words of someone he had hurt. Who was this boy.

"I'm not going to make you leave." Harry pulled his face out of the comfortable pillow. He looks at the other boy, who looks calm still but a hint of a smile plays on his face. "I'm actually quit lonely here, it would be nice to have someone else here."

"I'm lonely too." Harry admits and he sits facing the other boy. He gives a shy smile. Severus holds out his hand to introduce himself.

"Severus Snape." It was such an odd name, Harry instantly got it mixed up in his mind. "Sev." He noticed the look on his new friends face. Harry grins.

"Sev, that's a cool name, I hate my name." Severus must know who the boy is then? He just doesn't want to remember.

"Then you need a new one." Severus grins because of how the boys eyes widen in wonder. "What should your name be?" He pulls back in shock, Harry has the choice? He's allowed to be anyone. But who? Does he deserve to choose his own name?

"Will you pick?" When he was given his own name he hated how it was said, always negative but it seems like the boy before him would be entirely different.

"That's an important decision." Harry nods, for some reason he trusted this boy. "Okay... Well how... About... Alexander? Alex." His long drawn out question so he had a chance to pull a name from his memories since he put himself on the spot, he should have known his own memory wouldn't pick the name that he'd have to do it himself.

"Alex." Harry beams, he loved the idea of having a nick name. It felt special.

"You like it?" Sev laughs at his new friend Alex's glee, who nods and giggles. "Great, I'm almost nine, how old are you?" His mind was already slipping.

"Eight." Alex was so happy, he was the same age as his friend. Then Alex realised, he was already thinking of Sev as a friend, but he had never had one before, he didn't know if that was okay, or if that was wrong. He becomes sullen once again.

"It's not that bad." Sev knew that wasn't the problem but wasn't going to ask what was, if he didn't know the answer neither did Alex. "Are you tired?" That was another thing that waking up in this bed took away, the constant fatigue he felt, Alex felt amazing. So he shook his head. "Then let's talk." Sev wanted to find out everything his mind knows about this boy, whether he forgot it from growing old or from the fact his mind is slipping.

"What about?" Severus feels he should he know the answer to that question. Everything.

"I want to know all about you, why you don't think it's weird that you woke up in my room for starters." Why? Alex blushes.

"You didn't think it was weird, your so calm, I thought if I stayed calm too, you let me stay here, I don't even know how I got here." Alex stares down at his lap, a sadness bubbling, he knew deep down this peace couldn't last.

"I'm going to tell you, before I forget, Alex, none of this is real." His heart sank, what does that mean? "In the future, I'm in my home and I'm doing a type of meditation to help my mind be strong, I've been trapped here for a long time and now I've pulled you here too, so I think if we figure out why, then we can be finished here." Alec was a little frightened now, was the boys mind sick? It wasn't normal, Alec new that, no normal person would speak like that. "You don't believe me. Alex do you know about... Magic?" I know it's not real. The first thought that jumped to mind. A solid thought enforced by his uncles intimidating voice.

But in this place, his thoughts weren't controlled by his uncle, and he had already made the decision to trust this person. "Not really." He thought he understood that it was like doing tricks but he wasn't sure.

"Hmm well there's people who are humans but are born with magic within them..." As he continued to explain, Alex noticed how he became less serious and more excited to talk about this, He enjoyed listening. Sev explained the endless possibilities of what magic could do, Alex thought maybe Sev had given him one of the potions to stop pain. The last thing he explained was being in his room and trying to protect his mind from a bad man, in magic if you were really powerful you could read people's minds so Sev wanted to be powerful and stop that happening.

Alex had a memory too, he remembered laying in his bed and hearing a voice, it was quiet but frightened Alex, he was trying to get it to be silent. He didn't tell this to Sev. He did however accept Sev's explanation of magic and this not being real, Alex must have fallen asleep and was now dreaming his perfect escape, in a nice place with a friend. The best thing was Sev said that he's older like an adult but he was loosing his memory and would be like a kid again soon, not only was an adult being nice to him but so would someone his age, even if it wasn't real.

"I think if we figure out why you're here we can both leave but you'll have to remind me about that." Alex was almost giddy, he'd never have to leave here, never, not if Sev forgot. "Your smiling, so positive we'll get out of here?" So Alex agrees but a twinge of guilt.

That's when there's a woman's call from downstairs, her voice is high pitched but kind. "Severus, dinner." Alex freezes, there's other people here it's not just him and Sev.

"She's just part of my memory." Not the same way she is anyway, Severus' mother was exactly like he remembered her. Sev slides of the bed and waits for Alex to follow, he does uncertainly. Down the soft carpeted stairs, in through the cracked door to the dim kitchen, the light fixture flickers. But there's something Alex has never seen before, a kind looking woman with a big loving smile on her face, she kisses Sev's cheek . He pulls out his seat in front of a plate of food. The woman acts as if Alex isn't even there, he's confused with a little hurt. "My mother is part of my memory, you aren't so she can only act how she did in my memory." That was difficult for Alex to understand, everything around him not being real, it seemed more like he wasn't real.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer

"Alex!" Sev giggles, he had woken in the best mood, he was happy and excited, he was in his bed with his new friend's hair tickling his face. He couldn't wait to get up, he had a friend, someone who wasn't afraid of him or thought he was weird, or wanted to hurt him. "What should we do today? We can go to the woods, or the stream or the library or I know! I can bring you to meet Lilly!" Alex knew from the look in Sev's eyes and the tone of his voice that he wasn't an adult anymore.

"Sev." Alex forces himself to giggle. "You can't introduce me, I'm not real." It made sense in Alex's mind, but Sev looked confused. "You named me, I live with you, Sev don't be Silly, we both know your not a dummy." Sev sits up, a frown forms on his face. "Did you have something your supposed to do today?" Alec wasn't sure how this was supposed to work it was a memory so he can't change things even if he tried.

"My fathers coming home from his trip today... We should leave the house..." He glances away from Alex, if Alex is imaginary, that means he can tell him all his secrets. "My father's not a nice man, if he's angry he might hit my mother and... I don't want to see that." Alex was horrified, that wasn't what Sev's life was supposed to be like, Sev has such a nice mum, he has a big room and he gets all the food he needs. Why would he have a bad person, that's not fair.

"I hate mean people, let's go wherever you want." And they did, they went to the woods that was near his house and they ran around trying to catch each other and then Sev hide and Alex had to find him and then they saw a butterfly and tried to follow it.

Neither had ever felt so free.

When it was time to sneak back into the house Severus wasn't feeling the usual quickening of his heart instead it was calm. The tv was playing loudly in the front room and he heard the sound of a pot boiling. If he didn't tell his mother he was home she would be worried, he hoped she was in the kitchen.

Fortune was not on Severus' side. He creeps into the sitting room. "Close the damn door, your letting the heat out." Alex cringes at the yell, Sev drops his head, his mother must have said something that he didn't like, that tone meant he was angry. Meant if he didn't leave and shut the door right that instance he'd regret it.

In his fright he actually pushed Alex over to get out of his way of the door. His heart drops into his stomach, he was horrified at himself. He had just hurt his friend, he could tell by the look on Alex's face. Sev knew it, he knew he was a bad person just like everyone thought.

He couldn't bare to look at Alex's hurt expression so he ran, up the stairs and hurried into his bedroom. He felt himself shake, his vision blurred, he was panicking. All rational thought had fled from Severus' mind.

Alex slips into the room, Sev is facing away from him, his body quivering. "Are you crying?" He's not sure how to act whether to sit next to him or not.

"A-Alex, I'm surry." He whimpers, Alex doesn't understand. He knew what had happened, Sev's father had frightened him, he needed to escape, wanted to hide, Alex understood, what he didn't understand was Sev's reaction.

"Sev?" Alex scrambles onto the bed next to his friend, he sees the red face and the tears. "Sev..." He holds his friend, he lets him cry on his shoulder. "You know s'not so scary when you have a friend."

"Still friends?" Harry smiles, the tears have stopped falling.


End file.
